BLOG POST: Your Inner Heroine vs. Your Inner "Bad Guy"

Today (and tomorrow) I’m celebrating the holiday of Purim. We remember the story of how the Jewish people in ancient Persia were saved by a miracle. There's a contrast between the wicked character Haman, who is trying to annihilate the Jews, and the heroine, Queen Esther, who,aligns with the Divine to save the people.

As a very loose metaphor (because I would never say that we are “bad”) Purim reminds me that the “battle between good and evil” is always present. Why? So that you can align with the Divine and take a stand for yourself. By being aware of the inner ‘bad guy” you can overcome him with your inner “heroine”- and Divine help.

Who is this inner bad guy? It’s the one who tells you that you don’t have time for yourself and makes you put yourself last.

It's the voice that makes you put pressure on yourself and tells you there’s never enough time to do everything and makes you feel so overwhelmed you wish you could clone yourself.

(And then feel guilty for not getting everything done.)

He makes you stay up late so you’re exhausted the next day, feeling tired and sluggish so that you fall out of your routine, and then feel resentful towards your family. He’s trying his best to lead you to burning out!

On the other hand, your inner heroine is that voice inside who holds the vision of a life filled with more ease, flow and joy.

She’s the one who wants you to feel more in balance and alignment. She wants you to feel relaxed and have inner peace. To have more fun and feel more energetic.

And most of all, she wishes you could be present for the ones who matter most. So that you can enjoy life more.

She senses that there must be a way because she sees others in that happy place .

So when I didn’t understand this inner battleground, I was a mother of three young children trying to live up to an ideal spiritual life to make up for what must have been a low self-image.

In those days I could only hear the voice of the evil character. I didn’t know he was a part of myself that was calling for attention, compassion and healing. All I knew was that I had to push myself from a place of “not enough.” until I found myself in the hospital with a rare autoimmune condition that left me going blind in one eye!

It was at this point that I realized that if I didn’t get help, the road ahead would be much, much harder.

So I deepened my connection with the Divine. And I enlisted the help of several practitioners who supported and coached me to a new level of health and balance.

I healed quickly, for which I am grateful, and continued with guidance on my journey of transformation to create better habits for myself.

As a result, my my health improved,  relationships blossomed, I could enjoy my life more, and I planted the seeds for my professional practice as a coach and healer.

Could I have done this alone? Maybe. But it would have taken much longer -- and been more painful.

Since then I have continued to invest in professional support to reach greater levels of health and wellbeing which directly benefits the women who choose me to help them on their own personal growth journey towards wellness.

So, bottom line -- I have learned from my personal story that, It’s natural to feel the tug between our inner heroine -- what we want -- and our inner bad guy - how we show up in ways that don’t support us. The Purim narrative reminds us to pay attention to this inner conflict so we can take a stand for ourselves!

Just please, PLEASE don’t wait until you burn out before reaching out for help. If I knew what I know now...

Wishing you much love, many blessings, and above all, it's all good. Happy Purim!